Find Your Inner Child. Let them Keep Theirs.

 

Finding your inner child is useful in personal growth and empowerment. The part many of us are missing is a connection with spontaneity, freedom of spirit, and pure joy at discovering new things. I recently saw a news shot of a business which offers to adults a chance to be in pre-school! They can lighten up and reduce stress by playing, creating, coloring, singing and very importantly laughing. We all benefit from feeling joy!

shared from : kineticforgiveness.blogspot.com

shared from : kineticforgiveness.blogspot.com

Reconnecting to the joyful child you once were is beneficial if as a child you felt pushed to be something you were not ready to be or was not you at all. If over time it created a somber you, unable to let loose and have fun when the situation calls for it, your inner child may be in hiding. Your inner child may also have been bombarded with limiting beliefs or left to question self- worth. Whether or not you feel a need to rediscover or heal him or her, is up to you. But it presents the question, “Am I doing the same thing to my child?”

Children do need encouragement and support to grow and move past fear, but too often it isn’t their choice but what parents want them to do, or because “everybody is doing it”.   Pushing kids to do what is expected of them by comparison to other kids, standards of schools, what you did as a kid, what your parents expect, puts a lot of pressure on your children, as it did to you. Too often it doesn’t help them grow but diminishes the sense of self, increasing a feeling of lack, increase a feeling there is something wrong with them. Isn’t that how previous generations lost their inner child?

As I write about My Loving Self and Me I am reminded, that the True Self, the Loving Self can be diminished by siblings, other children in school or the neighborhood, and parents. The book speaks to the child, encouraging them to find their Loving Self and live from their heart. But it is necessary to remind adults that they too must do the same thing in interacting with children. Ask yourself as you read, if it is your Loving Self that your children see. Model the way you wish your child to be. Louise Hay in “Love your Inner Child”, encourages people to use the following affirmation to heal their inner child: “I am perfect, whole, and complete, just as I am.inner child The more you repeat this statement of truth about yourself, the quicker you will release the past.” Say it with your children when their self-worth is in jeopardy. Encourage them to expand their horizons with love and communication, listening to their fears and concerns. Keep your Loving Self present as you parent. Let them retain their inner child as they grow into caring, responsibility, and integrity with love.

 

Yes, You Should Read My Loving Self and Me!

The energy was wonderful at Wonderstone Gallery in Dunmore, Pennsylvania for the launch of My Loving Self and Me on April 18, 2015!   A grandmother and customer of the Gallery came by to tell me how important she believes the book to be. She had bought it earlier for her 12 year old grandson and they read it together- actually he reads to her. She shared that she too believes strongly that reading together with older children is valuable (see link in first blog entry) She continued to say that there just aren’t enough of this kind of book. Another woman was walking by and felt compelled to come in. After hearing a reading, she took a book to read to her church school class. It was delightful conversing with all those who stopped in!

The book contains 15 short stories that introduce children and adults beginning their spiritual journey, to their loving self or true spiritual self of God and ego, that part of the human which seeks personal wants and needs without a clear sense of the perspective and perception of others. The title story My Loving Self and Me introduces these concepts, simplified for young readers, and the rest of the stories add everyday situations that children like themselves face. The characters, Gabby and her brother Ike and their extended family deal with the issues which develop in life- fears, feeling badly about themselves, prejudice, bullying, responsibility, respect for nature, respect for themselves, giving and receiving and making choices.    The character children learn to see themselves as loving beings who make choices by going to their heart, and trusting in God for messages, peace and strength. They treasure their angels.  10858515_841382615903051_7792340483147793706_n

They learn to be still and listen, meditate and pray, and communicate with others. My intention is for your child to feel a connection with the characters and learn from Gabby and Ike’s experiences. For extra practice, each story is followed by a section called ‘It Takes Practice’ where they choose what their loving self would do. The answers to the questions are written to be easy, to build confidence in their choices, with follow up support that extends their understanding. Each story is also followed by a related poem. I have been told that while discussing the ‘It Takes Practice’ section, children have brought up situations from their school experience, something parents do not always hear. They also created their own questions for “What would your loving self do”? Wonderfully what I had intended!

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Someone far away can be a support by phone.

Not all children will have someone to read with them, nor will they have the support system of the book’s characters. In the summary they are guided to find an adult with whom they feel safe and are assured has their best interests at heart.   Everyone needs someone with whom they can share and get feedback. Although children will benefit from adult communication while they read, it certainly can be read independently.

The scenarios in the stories are based on elementary and middle school school experiences, but any parent can gain from reading them. Even if children are too young for the stories, parents can begin incorporating the concepts and the vocabulary into their child’s life. By the time they can read it, they will be pros at living from their heart!open your heart

The writing of “My Loving Self and Me”

After my retirement I began taking classes in self- improvement, spirituality and angel healing. Early on and for the first time, I received information on ego and true self.

act like it!

It struck a chord. The concept seemed so simple and yet changing my way of thinking and being, was not. Ego was so ingrained in me! Although it is much easier to recognize now and turn around, ego is a part of who we are. So many times as I read and practiced, I thought to myself, ‘boy would this have been easier if I knew about it a long time ago!’

That was when the concept of a book came to me- to write a picture book story of children learning about ego and their True Self of God in terms they could understand. My Loving Self and Me was born! It began as one story and grew from there. As my knowledge base grew, so did the topics Gabby and Ike experienced. The relationships with the adults in their lives grew as well. In most of the stories, the adults are there, and guide rather than tell them what to do. Gram does it much better than I do! As a self-proclaimed “fixer” of other people’s problems I am still working on letting those I love see their own solutions, sometimes with guidance if they ask, but without interference.

Before retiring, as both a teacher and a school administrator, I viewed much through the eyes of the children. One of the key things I discussed with parents was perspective. How children perceive things is usually not the same as the adults in their life and to communicate with them effectively, adults need to realize that and be open to the perceptions of the child.   Children are more apt to listen and consider the parents’ point of view when they know they have been heard and a dialog is available. The days of ‘because I said so’ are long gone as a viable solution. Being comfortable with discussing daily issues prepares parents for the days when the difficult issues appear. Rarely do things come ‘out of the blue’, and children who are comfortable bringing their issues to an adult in their life, are more apt to be comfortable sharing when they have made a mistake or are in danger. Dialog and consequences that are learning experiences rather than punishment for punishment sake, carried out without judgment or disappointment, enable that sharing as well. These conversations I had with parents in school to assist them in raising successful children, I wanted to share with others as well.

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As I wrote, my focus was on children and the difficulties with which they may have to deal in their life. Two of those children, always in my mind were my own grandchildren. Creating story scenarios of other children seemed an ideal format for discussion. They have too much in their lives that creates worry without adding to it through constant discussions of ‘what if’? The stories do that for me- and you.   The situation is someone else’s and the problem ends in a solution in a couple of pages.   And “What would your Loving Self do?” after each stories extends that practice.

As a new author, I didn’t realize immediately the scope it was taking. As a grandmother and past teacher, it was all about the kids.   As a mother and past administrator and teacher, I wrote for parents. As I grew in my own spirituality and self- empowerment I wrote for me. The last two were a surprise!