Take the Easy Route

How many times a day do you think you make a choice?  Depending on your outlook you may think it is a lot, or none at all, being assured that others make the decisions for you.  We all make choices from an extra  10 minutes of sleep, to grabbing an umbrella, or washing the coffee cup.  The thing is when we think we are taking a short cut, or taking the easy way we often are creating a more time consuming or difficult situation later in the day or somewhere down the road of life.  Not washing your utensils and placing them in the sink throughout the day saved seconds that created a bigger mess at the end of the day.  But washing the cup when finished seems at the time to be wasted time.  Grabbing the umbrella might be something you “don’t have time for” and yet makes life easier when the downpour the weather prediction called for barrels down on  you.

Why does the easier ways seem more difficult at the time we make the choice?   Perhaps we see the future as having no limits on our time.  We won’t be rushed, or pressured in any way. Perhaps there is a rainbow at the end of our thoughts that isn’t there at the time. Perhaps we are just too involved in the moment and not at all thinking of our future.

Most of us have experiences in which we afterwards think to ourselves, “I wish I had done it differently.”  Hopefully they are small situations, but sometimes the consequences take years to develop.

For me it has been nutrition.  I am not overly educated nor ignorant, knowing enough to live a healthy lifestyle, but I didn’t.  I had some interesting stories I told myself as well.  One of the greatest limiting beliefs was that if all this food being offered and advertised was so unhealthy, “they” wouldn’t be allowed to advertise it as they do.  There has been another story in my mind concerning deserving a treat.  How different things would be if that story told me I deserved optimum health.

So now after all the years of assuming that it is ok to be acidic, to drink, eat sugar, not exercise regularly BECAUSE I am really not sick, I am now diseased. My body as  a petri  dish tells the  story.  And simply put, all disease grows in an acid environment.

I take this very seriously now.  I am not looking for sympathy but for others to see that eating processed food daily, sugar daily, ignoring vegetables or only eating the ones high in sugar (yes vegetables have sugar!), and convincing themselves that it is OK because they feel fine, is not taking the easy route.  It is being short sighted because decisions made today can have effects in the future.  Caring for yourself is so much easier than caring for a diseased, injured or weak body later, when you are tired and run down or the “cure” wears your body down to nothing.

Some things that are the easy route to a happy healthy life:

Drink water to keep  hydrated.  Other things like juice, soda, and alcohol  should be limited. Think of them as an occasional treat.

Brush and floss your teeth.  It is not time consuming!

God didn’t invent bras.  Use bras in public and let the girls hang free in private, allowing the lymph system  to do its job.

Move Frequently! Don’t sit for too long for the same reason.

Pack a lunch you make yourself that doesn’t come prewrapped. Think fresh.  No, it doesn’t take forever! Avoid fast food.

Get a water bottle that isn’t plastic or aluminum and take fresh water with you everywhere.

Laugh!

Limit sugar anything to a couple times a week.

Listen to music.

Be mindful, meditate or pray.  Get out of ego state whenever possible.

Be around people you love and who love you.  There is nothing more important. Hug!

Be grateful for everything and feel that gratitude .

Smile! Smile!  Smile!

Sending you blessings for health and happiness!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Is it Possible that you have Limiting Beliefs?

The news this week was full and controversial! The Supreme Court as you know legalized gay/ lesbian marriage, and with it came soooooo many opinions! The president announced that the healthcare act is here to stay. The Confederate flag is coming down in so many places and everyone has an opinion- or 3. The most outstanding part of it all is not so much the actual incidents that occurred but the reactions of people. Oh the comments I read on Facebook and they are my “friends”! What happened to having a belief and listening to someone else’s openly without judgment and criticism? So much name calling and generalization! One meme in particular lined up the 3 happenings above with a comment something to do with “Take that Republicans!” I thought they were individual human and civil rights issues and was surprised to the reference to politics.   So much generalization, assumption and even discrimination!

I used to be staunchly protective and defensive of my beliefs so I get some of it, but I also have learned a valuable lesson that began small and grows every day. That is the concept of Limiting Beliefs.   While learning about this I questioned many of my own beliefs asking myself not so much why I believed that but if in fact I really did. It was surprising how many of the opinions I defended were not mine, but something that was passed down during early childhood.   Who knows for how many generations that belief has been strong, or what the catalyst for that belief was. It may have been valid for that time and that situation, but out of context it makes no sense. And yet the belief continues to grow.

During contemplation, I have also discovered that beliefs can come from ignorance- not having all the facts, becoming emotionally connected to a concept based on someone else’s emotions, or jumping to conclusions. Whatever the inception of the belief, it is a personal one for which everyone should be responsible.

I avoid general online areas that allow for comments like after videos or stills that come up with a specific topic because most of the time I find it distressing. So many comments have no other intent than to diminish the validity of other human beings. Name calling and jokes is a painful and unnecessary part of growing up, and yet it is alive and well throughout the internet sites presumably posted by adults. Everybody has an opinion and it is the right one. Sadly it is part of their belief that being right somehow gives them the right to ridicule and reduce the self worth of others.

I recommend self-analysis of beliefs. It is cathartic and freeing in that it allows you to discover the true you of your heart unencumbered by hidden influences. The beliefs with which you find a deep resonance are yours but not necessarily anyone else’s. Be OK with that. It doesn’t diminish the validity of your belief. You are good without anyone else’s agreement. There are too many proverbial bandwagons and they are all standing room only. You don’t need to wait in line to jump on. Know yourself and be true to yourself.

It is time to find a place where the greater good of Americans is the focus in all our hearts. I almost wrote, “It is time to get back to ……”   but then questioned whether we have had a period of time where it was truly about the greater good. Even today many fortify their opinion by saying, “The American people want”, or “It is for the American people”. We sure like to hear that their plan is for “We the People”!   Is it? Are they coming from their hearts or their egos? Am I? Are you? Whether for ourselves, our families, our communities or country, isn’t it time to come from our hearts? Analyzing our beliefs helps us determine if we are doing that.

Celebrations From Within the Heart

I love Father’s Day and Mother’s Day celebrations because it is a time we get together for a few hours over a nice meal and enjoy each other’s company.   Tradition in this country is for gifts and cards, too. (Well, come to think of it isn’t that our tradition for everything??) In many families I believe it is a time to remind children of all ages that it is someone’s special day and to be nice. Kids hear, “Don’t fight.” “Be nice.” “Say Happy Mother’s Day”, “Happy Birthday”, or whatever is celebrated. Some even get dressed up in their finest. There are many special celebrations!

I sit here wondering how these celebrations are different in families that practice living from their heart every day. I would love to see discussion on this page! My grandson is naturally a from- the- heart- kid. He enters the door and seeks both of us out for a hug and “I love you” before heading off to do something. He never leaves without a repeat. In between, he has his “Why can’t I…” “I want…”, “Why do I have to…????” , like many other kids, but he is respectful and caring every day. Celebrations are not necessary when every day is from the heart. The interesting thing is, those that live from their heart, look forward to celebrating others! They don’t resent it, it is a joy!

Each child has their own unique personality and reacts to living with the same upbringing in different ways. Some truly hold onto living from their heart more easily than others. Others become entrenched in serving themselves. This is one area where modeling doesn’t always work. (But don’t stop exhibiting through your words and actions how they should be!) Not all children learn to be loving from being treated lovingly. We cannot expect children to want to treat others the way they are treated because the truth is many receive the message that they are worthy to be treated that way. Reciprocation is not considered when it is they who are the deserving ones. Conundrum sometimes, isn’t it?

imagesDU8B6AI2Giving gratitude each day is a wonderful way for children to begin to learn to live from their heart. It can start with one thing, one general thing, one superficial thing, one selfish thing. And it doesn’t even matter if it is sincere in the beginning. Gratitude is a way of living that takes time for many, especially if they believe they are entitled. It is a small thing to do in your family. It can be done with each child, one at a time each day. Every day. Consistently. Why do I say one child at a time? Firstly what a special discussion time for you and your child every day! Secondly, kids are competitive. By talking with them alone, each has the opportunity to speak without feeling theirs wasn’t as good as a sibling. Janet Eltaktouk wrote an article in the Sun Sentinel entitled Five Ways to Create an Attitude of Gratitude in Children that continues this discussion. Every little bit of gratitude is a good thing!

After a few weeks, discuss gratitude about certain activities, abilities or people. What are you grateful for that happened in school today? What are you grateful to Grandpop for? Later, you can add things like, Do you think your teacher knows you are grateful for him or something he did? How could you let your sister know you appreciate her? Children who begin to recognize all the things in their lives they have to be grateful for, and give gratitude for them will increase living from their heart. The day will come when most days are days of celebration!

gratitude

The writing of “My Loving Self and Me”

After my retirement I began taking classes in self- improvement, spirituality and angel healing. Early on and for the first time, I received information on ego and true self.

act like it!

It struck a chord. The concept seemed so simple and yet changing my way of thinking and being, was not. Ego was so ingrained in me! Although it is much easier to recognize now and turn around, ego is a part of who we are. So many times as I read and practiced, I thought to myself, ‘boy would this have been easier if I knew about it a long time ago!’

That was when the concept of a book came to me- to write a picture book story of children learning about ego and their True Self of God in terms they could understand. My Loving Self and Me was born! It began as one story and grew from there. As my knowledge base grew, so did the topics Gabby and Ike experienced. The relationships with the adults in their lives grew as well. In most of the stories, the adults are there, and guide rather than tell them what to do. Gram does it much better than I do! As a self-proclaimed “fixer” of other people’s problems I am still working on letting those I love see their own solutions, sometimes with guidance if they ask, but without interference.

Before retiring, as both a teacher and a school administrator, I viewed much through the eyes of the children. One of the key things I discussed with parents was perspective. How children perceive things is usually not the same as the adults in their life and to communicate with them effectively, adults need to realize that and be open to the perceptions of the child.   Children are more apt to listen and consider the parents’ point of view when they know they have been heard and a dialog is available. The days of ‘because I said so’ are long gone as a viable solution. Being comfortable with discussing daily issues prepares parents for the days when the difficult issues appear. Rarely do things come ‘out of the blue’, and children who are comfortable bringing their issues to an adult in their life, are more apt to be comfortable sharing when they have made a mistake or are in danger. Dialog and consequences that are learning experiences rather than punishment for punishment sake, carried out without judgment or disappointment, enable that sharing as well. These conversations I had with parents in school to assist them in raising successful children, I wanted to share with others as well.

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As I wrote, my focus was on children and the difficulties with which they may have to deal in their life. Two of those children, always in my mind were my own grandchildren. Creating story scenarios of other children seemed an ideal format for discussion. They have too much in their lives that creates worry without adding to it through constant discussions of ‘what if’? The stories do that for me- and you.   The situation is someone else’s and the problem ends in a solution in a couple of pages.   And “What would your Loving Self do?” after each stories extends that practice.

As a new author, I didn’t realize immediately the scope it was taking. As a grandmother and past teacher, it was all about the kids.   As a mother and past administrator and teacher, I wrote for parents. As I grew in my own spirituality and self- empowerment I wrote for me. The last two were a surprise!